Reviews by manonamora
reallybadifjam
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Method in My Madness is a short experimental Twine piece about a borderline-mad person’s obsession over a man. Through stylized text, unfinished sentences, and hidden choices, you get a cool visual sense of the broken-like thoughts bouncing in one’s mind. There are two endings, leading to blank screens.
It seems more like a proof of concept/prototype than a fully realised piece. I think it would need just a bit more fleshing out.
GUT2 is the spoof/sequel of GUT THE MOVIE, where you don’t just play as the original trio, but also TER, the (Eurovision inspired?) rival trio, who is trying to one-up GUT by making a sequel before they do. It uses a similar gameplay as the original game, with having different actions for each character, except that it flips from one trio to the next.
Until the original, this spoof does not let you go very far, with most of your attempts being losing endings (either because your chosen idea was bad/impossible to make or because the game is broken), and one win by default (because GUT just doesn’t bother making the sequel). Still, it was funny how it poked fun at the original game, with even sillier actions or by simply giving up on it. It probably has also the smallest iframe I’ve seen in a long time.
stage fright is a short horror Twine piece, with a looping component. During a student play, your sparring partner gets a nosebleed, bad enough that it freaks you out and stops you from performing the rest of the scene. Queue leaving the stage en embarrassment and… finding your way back to the start again. Reliving the same scene over and ov–
oh, no, actually. Just once. Because you run into some broken links which stops you from experiencing the other coded scenes (though some of them are broken in other ways). It is a bit of a shame, because the concept of the story is really interesting in and of itself, and the nightmare/horror loop to escape (as some sort of stage fright metaphor) is pretty cool to explore.
the CHRONICLES of YORLANDIA: part One: The calm before THE STORM is a short Twine adventure game where you find a note from your friend/boy-girlfriend/love of your life, where you learn their father found out about your background and forbid them from ever seeing you again! Unless you meet them at 3am at a certain space… Except, it’s in just a bit, and you’re still in bed.
Will you make it in time?
Well… this won’t be in this entry that you will find the truth, as the exciting starting adventure ends on a cliffhanger as soon as you reach the first action point. You’re already on the edge of your seat, with a maybe cliché but still entertaining setting, and it’s pulled right under you! SACRILEGE!
There are also some fun little winks parsed throughout the game, of what could have been in unfinished coded elements, or of meta elements about the author and the development of the story, making us want to know more about the project.
But death to unnecessary timed text.
Cloak of Cleansing is a short parser, as a spoof of the Cloak of Darkness. Unlike the original, the world has been expanded and the goal as changed. You do not start with a cloak on your shoulders, but rather, must find your own. The message in the bar is still there, but is now too obscene to be displayed on screen or interact with. Instead, you must interact with a new NPC who will reward you for your unique “sense of style” (I think there’s a HHGG reference there?). Most of the game is pretty railroady after that puzzle is completed, and a sudden shift in tone/genre.
The parser is fairly bare with only a limited amount of command defined (or giving a response - even X ME doesn’t do much). I’m pretty sure I ran into a bug in the bar as well, where I ended up being stuck, unable to go back to the foyer (going against the “you can’t lose” admission in the blurb).
Why? is a kinetic entry created for the Really Bad IF, where you follow/are Luna, a transgender girl going about her day(s), talking to other people or herself. It is pretty nonsensical, especially with each scene loosely connected to the next and with typos everywhere adding on to the confusion (sometime it’s even played for laughs!), or when the game fakes an early ending. There are some funny lines and statements, making the more obviously bad elements worse.
A cute evening with your best friend (who's also a vampire)!, June 4, 2024 I am oblivious to the fact that my best friend is a vampire is a fantasy slice-of-life Ink (Calico) story, where you’ve invited your best friend to spend the evening doing things that friends do: watch a movie, play some games, have some food, chat, and what not. But, as the title suggests, your best friend is not… quite human - a fact you are completely oblivious about, even when the signs are all there!
With each sequence, you have multiple options to interact with Nico (that’s your lovely friend btw, who brought cake!), though you will end up with the same general sequence of event: Nico enters, you have some activities, they want to talk to you. Yet, it doesn’t matter that the only obvious effect you have on the evening is which activities you do and in which order. Because…
… it’s just lovely. Your interactions with Nico are super nice, and awkward and embarrassing at times. Even if you are oblivious to the major signs, the dialogue is really charming and funny. I laughed quite a bit while playing, especially at all the vampire references going over “You”.
Country Song at its finest!, June 3, 2024 Country Song Ghostwriting Simulator is a short Twine game in which your cousin Trevor asks you to help him write a banger of a country song. If you do not refuse, you are given a handful of topics to write that song. There are about a half-dozen endings.
Save for one path that is downright heartbreaking, the whole game is pretty hilarious. From the listed tropes of current country song topics (Beer, Girls, Truck, USA!!! and maybe Jesus/Satan), to the twist-takes on each topic, you actually get some really really funny (fake) country songs right on the page. I laughed SO HARD at the Hot Girls option. If these were actually playing on the radio, I would not question it.
But there is also that one sad path. If you do not write that country song with your cousin, you go down a pretty dark path. I think it might be the longest of all the entries, and it is really sad, maybe bitter sweet at the end, but still. I chose it first, and it might have been the best way to experience the game, cause it’s really a bummer path.
Overall, a pretty good short and humoristic game!
Cool as a Cucumber is a slice-of-life visual novel where you wake up without any of your memories and must meet again all your male roommates. Set up as some sort romance story, you fall in love with one of them, and are ready to do anything to get him to fall in love in you. There are a handful of choices throughout the game, but only one (the last one) seems to matter to get one of the three endings.
It doesn’t makes much sense, to why this band of people share a house with you (especially since one of them has essentially been isekai’ed here, and another is a merman??), nor does the game expand on how you got this way. It even goes in contradiction with itself (saying it’s hot outside but showing a snowy background). But there are some funny elements parsed throughout, if you like that second-hand embarrassment kind of humour.
mall_walk is a short weirdcore interactive point-and-click piece, where you can explore a grayscale mall except for one dark path. There’s also a strange shape you can interact with, with some of the listed options allowing you to explore a supplementary part. I don’t think you can leave the mall, nor is there a concrete ending.
I think does the weirdcore vibes justice, letting the images speak for themselves with the way they are edited. The dithering effect on each screen seals the deals on that. And how you meet and get closer to the shape is creepy as heck.
A Colorful World is a cute short visual novel, where two friends (who I believe are children) meet, play some games and have fun together. It’s really simple, with only a couple of choices, and essentially two paths to see all there is to it.
The interface is pretty simple, with a static background showing the two protagonist, drawn in a child-like matter (with like crayons), and with a cute little background track.
It really is cute, and child-friendly!
A solid first try at IF!, June 2, 2024 Grocery Quest is a short humorous Twine game where you play as an elf, in a quest of acquiring a Slushy and a Hot Dog at the local Fantasy 7-11. But the path between you and the desired item is essentially cursed: you will need to be careful in your actions and movements to get there safely, and retrieve said items with your life. There are multiple endings, with the winning state requiring a bit of sleuthing.
Even if short, it was pretty funny. The humour is on point and it made me want to get that elf its darn meal! I chuckled a lot. It’s pretty absurd, but it’s also my kind of jam. I also liked the use of formatting of part of the text, adding to the silliness of it all!
Damned whatever you do... ?, June 2, 2024 ohhh dear is a tiny Twine story about crows, and their wish to better crowkind. You (apparently being a crow too) must choose the course of action that will set the crows’ future, by choosing one of two options. You are not given the specifics on what those options are, learning only about their consequences when you choose them. There are two endings, neither of them being particularly great for you.
Half of the “game” is however spent on a short tangent about how the game came to be, rather than the story itself, kinda chopping off its wings before it could actually fly. Which is a shame because it could make for a fun concept (from what I’ve gathered of the endings). But props for putting it together so soon before the deadline, like participating in Speed-IF without it being a restriction xD.
Wedding Party is a parser-like game where you are currently attending, as the title suggests, a wedding party. During the main event, you are presented with multiple possible actions, from leaving the wedding to very strange behaviours (like squeaking?! it’s also a counter?). You also able to move around, seeing other spots at the wedding and interacting with NPCs. If there is an ending to it, I didn’t find it.
Oh, and there’s a bit red button that you can press! Which of course I did.
I’m not sure what the whole point was, though your available actions nudges you to essentially disrupt the wedding (making people very confused at best, disgusted probably). You can run away loudly for some reason, and can’t really get back to the party after that (the movements buttons don’t really work). You can interact with things, though there doesn’t seem to be much effect to it.
Shame the red button doesn’t really end the whole game right away.
T-Shirt Aisle is the location in which you are standing in this small Twine game, in front of a wall of very soft and enticing t-shirts (as in, you want to shove your face into the fabric and stay there forever), and well… maybe have some weird surreal slightly existential experience? Oh, and there’s a long thought process about Keanu Reeves.
The blurb indicates there are many endings to the game (I think I found 3, the source files indicates about a dozen?), some of them being harder to reach than others. Essentially, you’d need to do some loop-ty-loop around the different passages to see those choices listed. Some of them are pretty creepy.
Truly an experience. Would shove my face in soft t-shirts again.
To queue or not to queue... or what happens when you don't have a choice., June 1, 2024 Keep Queuing is a mind-numbing yet philosophical Twine game about queuing. At the mall, your sister, currently in queue to get the latest phone, asks for a big favour: for you to take her place so she can go to the bathroom. Since you are the best sibling in the world, you agree (not like you have a choice) and start to queue.
… and queue…
… and queue…
… and don’t stop queuing until you reach the door, and get your sister’s phone, and that’s when the game ends. Because, yes, you are a great sibling, you don’t leave the queue, even if you wish it to.
While you wait for the line to move, different prompts appear on the screen, showing the passing of time. You look at things around you or stare at your phone, ponder on the meaning of time and queuing or simply blank, etc… There are about 100 prompts you can “collect” while waiting, all of them appearing randomly (sometimes you get the same one in one playthrough).
The number of prompts you see is also random. I’ve waited 18 and 61 minutes for the most extremes. And knowing there are 100 prompts to find, many of them are hilarious (to me), you are incentivised in going back into the queue and trying to wait even longer!
The funniest bit about the game, however, comes with the ending screen. It might be the most unexpected ending screen I’ve seen: an afterword and pitch all into one. It discuss how the game was created and its future, in hopes someone would want to throw in a few bux and fund the sequel (seemingly slightly poking fun at those unserious Kickstarter campaigns). It really gave me a good laugh (the III MMO roguelike queue, genius)
A really great queuing simulator!
The Simuloid Affair: Infinite Possibilities is a short timed (turns) parser starting (well, more like ending) with a bang! You wake up from a strange dream and find on the other side of the barrel of a gun pointed at you, your partner in crime, hunting you down for being… not a human, it turns out. OH! and there’s also a bomb that will blow up in a minute (about a dozen-ish turns?).
The title suggest an infinite amount of ways to get yourself out of this sticky situation, with many ways of escaping and be free of all of this, maybe even learn if you’re truly a simuloid or someone up-high has done this to get back at you. Kinda gives me heavy Blade Runner vibes.
Except… well. You’re not really a dexterous person (somehow!!! considering you’re a hunter??), so getting out of there is tricky. Really tricky. Almost impossibly tricky.
If you don’t manage to get out, or just want to stay a bit longer because Ursula (your partner) needs to unload (hehe, she has a gun) what’s on her mind, you’d learn quite a bit about yourself, how everything got to this point, and your environment.
Who am I kidding… not a single command works in this game. You can try your best! But you will get at best a proper fail response, or just a random one that is barely related to what you just typed.
The game (I started with failing on purpose at first) has such a great setup that you can’t believe it would just end like this. I mean, I should have expected it, but it still managed to pull the rug under me EVERY SINGLE TIME. Damn it.
Terrence is an experience. There is no better way of simply describing it. It is a painful flow of second-hand embarrassment that ends only after 47min.
To get more technical, Terrence is an almost text-less visual novel, a mostly ad-libbed monologue, where you stand in the closet with the titular character, with only a single Leave button. You can stay in the closet, listen to Terrence ramble on about many subjects, or leave him behind with his thoughts (a probably better option, for your sake).
If you choose to have the full 47 min experience, you will learn a lot more about Terrence than you would ever want to. His disturbing past, his not-so-great relationships, his hobbies, his many thoughts, his favourite meals, his questionable life-models, his poneysona (I will shame him), and… let’s not forget the least worst of all: his poetry (not ad-libbed, but read aloud). You will also have to sit through long Uhhhhhhhhh and awkward silences.
Terrence is a bit of a creep, probably a bit of an incel, potentially a murderer(?), and definitely not mentally well or sound of mind. It would be kind of guy who would start up a conversation and would absolutely not let you leave, forcing you to answer his invasive questions when you are getting close to escape, and absolutely would make a scene if his ego is bruised. In short, he is the worst and his voice is grating as hell, and I never want to hear it again.
Though I call it a monologue, Terrence tries to have some sort of conversation with you, asking you questions about yourself. It is just the game does not give you the option to answer them (for good reason, alluded at the end: (Spoiler - click to show)you are a figment of his imagination and he takes meds to make you disappear).
I sat through this 47-min one-take (yes, really) monologue just to write this review. It was 47min I will not get back. But you can save yourself the troubles and not click play… though you will miss on the pretty great voice acting that did a great job making me hate a character as soon as he opened his mouth.
Someone should transcribe the monologue and add it as subtitles, so everyone can enjoy(?) Terrence in most of its glory without hearing him talk.
So yea… an experience, for sure.
Ninth Circle of HELL!!! But I also can't give it a one-star..., May 29, 2024 I honestly don’t know if I should be impressed… or terrified. I was certainly annoyed and frustrated for most of the game, that is certain. So much so that I barely paid attention to most of the actual writing or what was going on. Just trying to go through the gruelling gameplay, hoping for the least amount of psychic damage.
The World’s Most Annoying Game is a one turn parser, but also not really. You are standing before a Great House, that no one bears to go through it. Except you will, if you try hard enough. The house is dark and you have no lamp with you (you won’t find any). It is also so terrifying that you will shiver and shake and faint in horror if you make one wrong move (and the game will literally close). And there are 100 rooms you need to go through before you exit the house. It is also seed-generated (everyone has a different run) and there is no ABOUT or HELP or explanation.
Does it start to make sense now? About the absolute absurdity of the game? The cruelty to endure?
It is, however, not impossible to finish the game (because, well, I painfully have). It does require some special words inside your command so you may go through the house in that one single command. A built-in word, but rarely used: (Spoiler - click to show)then. With it, you will be able to finish the game in…
a good 4 hours.
Yes, that long. Even with a bit of cheating, there is still a lot of trial and errors. Forced restart at every corner. It is incredibly tedious. The first third is frustrating (even after you find how to make it work). The second third becomes pretty boring (it’s always the same thing). And the last, well… if you managed to pull through until then, it has to be because of spite.
Oh and if you’re trying to keep track of the different rooms? Yeah… don’t bother making a map. IT WILL NOT MAKE SENSE! The whole thing is procedurally generated (random room, random direction). Just the command and the name of the rooms is sufficient.
This is truly the quintessential mad scientist insane project. This game should probably be send to your enemies (or to troll your friends). Absolute torture.
But I feel proud for being the first person to beat it :P
Stop at the first ending you get., May 29, 2024 BEER is a relatively short Twine piece where two teenagers are trying to (illegally) buy some beer, discussing their plan to hopefully acquire the loot. And it doesn’t really go as they expect it . There multiple “endings”, with some only accessible through hidden links. I say “endings” because, if you are patient enough, you will end up getting stuck inside a trippy loop.
It’s pretty silly, starting with one of those teen adventures that may or may not end well. I haven’t really seen those in real life (cause we always had that one friend or sibling who was old enough to get us beer), but I’m sure it’s definitely a thing!
But then… you get these weird errors (fake, because Harlowe errors don’t look like that - except one later in a path), mentioning old Gods and a nudge at Greek Mythology (the Odysseus variable), as if those teens, oblivious to everything around them, stumbled into something they shouldn’t have (you may or may not die in one ending). Which… why? What does beer have to do with Gods? (or more what doesn’t xD)
Like many annoying games, this one also includes some timed elements, though it is to hide the truly nonsensical trippy, eye-maddening path (awful colour contrast/animated elements). It is completely disjointed from the main story…
Has some good, even for a deliberately bad game.
Capitalism always wins :(, May 29, 2024 Coca-Cola Presents: 🥤 Fuck Capitalism Jam 2032 🥤 is a short bitsy/bipsy game, set in the very near future of 2032 (oh this review is not going to age well soon…), at the dawn of a new edition of the Fuck Capitalism Jam. You are an excited little sprite getting ready to leave your oppressing little room to join the event, held in person in Madrid, ad the IFEMA centre. This year, as with a couple of years now, the event has been sponsored by a big corporation! Because, they too are looking to defeat capitalism, and make the world a better place!
So, funny thing, expecting a bleak dystopian future, from the start of the game, seeing a very anti-capitalist unranked jam being not only turned into a competition but also sponsored by capitalist ventures, I misread the location as FEMA centre and thought “Yeah… That checks out.” as if in the near future the US would take over Spain or something. I didn’t question it one bit, because it weirdly still fit. xD (it’s actually the IFEMA Convention Center in Madrid, a very real place hosting very real conventions).
Back to the game.
It’s a pretty humorous jab at capitalism (duh, from the title), with tons of references to real companies and their mode of work (ex: MLM Herbalife, I actually expected more of those xD), and events growing so much so quickly it loses its original purpose (become the thing you swore to destroy). A bit of a cautionary tale, based on real events, where things meant “for the people, free, in aeternum”, turns into a for-profit and ruins everything…
Now, it’s obviously not very realistic: the timeline is maybe a bit too short for this to happen, I don’t believe the organiser is going to be a capitalist stan anytime soon, and I would be super shocked if Godot was bought by Roblox (please, let this be a nightmare). But it does remind us not to take the good (free) things in our lives for granted. Because it could be gone in an instant…
With little (and made in a very short amount of time), it is pretty impactful. I enjoy checking out the “submitted projects for the competition”, and how they clashed with their respective sponsors. That was really funny.
Worst narrator ever. , May 29, 2024 You’re the Judge Now, Dog! is a Twine game(??), partly meta, partly a joke game (duh), partly… I don’t know how to characterise it? a rant? a weird praise? It’s a bit all over the place. There are 5 endings, some more gruelling to get than others.
The whole game moves along with the whims of an unlikeable narrator, who really wants to talk to you about Buford Rootberg, and how amazing of a guy he is (and how much of a looser you are), in between weird rants about –spin the wheel to pick a topic– and pokes at your disappointing… well, evertyhing. You go through an interview (a bit humiliating), shove your face with Hot Pockets (no vegetarian options?!), and bomb the ratings of all the games submitted to the jam (obviously they deserved it!).
I am not quite sure what exactly happens next, whether your life turns upside down and goes through some surreal experience where you are granted the honour of meeting (again) Buford Rootberg… or if it’s just some weird dream because of your definitely poor diet (so many Hot Pockets!!).
The absolute worst thing about this game, aside from the infuriating narrator and his questionable takes, was the timed text. Absolutely awful. Every single line is timed (around 2s each) and you have many many lines to read per passage.
Also pretty bad? The links. In three different spots, your page is covered with links (one is slightly worse than the other), all of which you have to click to go through. Infuriating. My hand would like a refund, please and thank you.
For some reason, the audio wasn’t working (I tried downloading the game, opening it on different browser, used the toggle…) and some images were broken too.
And for the low, very low price of $7,734.40, you too can own the source code (or skip the pay button). It actually does some interesting things with loops, especially with the randomised placement of links in loops.
So, yeah… it’s pretty bad. As you’d expect.
Unfinishable due to coding error :/, May 28, 2024 time for bed is a relatively short parser game with a simple objective: get ready for bed. To do that you need to get into your pyjamas, drink a warm cup of milk, and brush your teeth. The map is pretty small: bedroom, bathroom, living room, kitchen. There are multiple endings and achievements to find while playing the game. It also has a fairly limited vocabulary (no synonyms).
On top of this, it’s got some pretty fun humour, that got my chuckling quite a bit. Like starting with the tutorial but not the game, doing the suggested commands, searching through the rooms. Something you’d definitely expect of that kind of simple, slice of life, chill puzzle game. Also, it was nice to get an obvious visual for when to press to continue and input the next command.
Except… I am not sure the game can be actually finished. On multiple occasions, I would get a server timeout or my window would just close mid-way through giving me a response (like wear pyjamas was impossible!). There are also issues of unresponsive commands (can’t examine/interact described objects), and some friction with the commands (can only put something in the microwave with the open microwave command).
Shaaaame… :_:
Wished it was longer :/, May 27, 2024 'Steading of the Hill Giant Chief is a short fantasy parser game where you play as a wizard just back from a beating by a giant. Though your ego is a bit bruised (and maybe your body is too), nothing will stop you from defeating those perfidious creatures… you just need a new plan and get ready.
Using a (very) limited list and ample hints, the puzzles are fairly easy to complete. You just need a good weapon, a fitting costume, and maybe a potion for extra help. Some of the commands even do extra steps (like taking an ingredient will also put it in the cauldron). Always a bonus point for including a cat and letting us pet it.
On the other hand, some objects are not always quite obvious (like the exact ingredient listed somewhere else but that general descriptions) or not described (though, they don’t really matter, so that’d OK). But if you read the responses properly, it isn’t really difficult to go around it.
Finally, the writing. It’s fantastic. It hits just the right balance of hilarious, but in that kind of old TTRPG/Fantasy game style. I didn’t even finish the intro that I was already laughing so hard. It was so much fun, I was disappointed to see it end so quickly!
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