Reviews by manonamora

Terrence is an experience. There is no better way of simply describing it. It is a painful flow of second-hand embarrassment that ends only after 47min.

To get more technical, Terrence is an almost text-less visual novel, a mostly ad-libbed monologue, where you stand in the closet with the titular character, with only a single Leave button. You can stay in the closet, listen to Terrence ramble on about many subjects, or leave him behind with his thoughts (a probably better option, for your sake).

If you choose to have the full 47 min experience, you will learn a lot more about Terrence than you would ever want to. His disturbing past, his not-so-great relationships, his hobbies, his many thoughts, his favourite meals, his questionable life-models, his poneysona (I will shame him), and… let’s not forget the least worst of all: his poetry (not ad-libbed, but read aloud). You will also have to sit through long Uhhhhhhhhh and awkward silences.

Terrence is a bit of a creep, probably a bit of an incel, potentially a murderer(?), and definitely not mentally well or sound of mind. It would be kind of guy who would start up a conversation and would absolutely not let you leave, forcing you to answer his invasive questions when you are getting close to escape, and absolutely would make a scene if his ego is bruised. In short, he is the worst and his voice is grating as hell, and I never want to hear it again.

Though I call it a monologue, Terrence tries to have some sort of conversation with you, asking you questions about yourself. It is just the game does not give you the option to answer them (for good reason, alluded at the end: (Spoiler - click to show)you are a figment of his imagination and he takes meds to make you disappear).

I sat through this 47-min one-take (yes, really) monologue just to write this review. It was 47min I will not get back. But you can save yourself the troubles and not click play… though you will miss on the pretty great voice acting that did a great job making me hate a character as soon as he opened his mouth.

Someone should transcribe the monologue and add it as subtitles, so everyone can enjoy(?) Terrence in most of its glory without hearing him talk.

So yea… an experience, for sure.

I honestly don’t know if I should be impressed… or terrified. I was certainly annoyed and frustrated for most of the game, that is certain. So much so that I barely paid attention to most of the actual writing or what was going on. Just trying to go through the gruelling gameplay, hoping for the least amount of psychic damage.

The World’s Most Annoying Game is a one turn parser, but also not really. You are standing before a Great House, that no one bears to go through it. Except you will, if you try hard enough. The house is dark and you have no lamp with you (you won’t find any). It is also so terrifying that you will shiver and shake and faint in horror if you make one wrong move (and the game will literally close). And there are 100 rooms you need to go through before you exit the house. It is also seed-generated (everyone has a different run) and there is no ABOUT or HELP or explanation.

Does it start to make sense now? About the absolute absurdity of the game? The cruelty to endure?

It is, however, not impossible to finish the game (because, well, I painfully have). It does require some special words inside your command so you may go through the house in that one single command. A built-in word, but rarely used: (Spoiler - click to show)then. With it, you will be able to finish the game in…

a good 4 hours.

Yes, that long. Even with a bit of cheating, there is still a lot of trial and errors. Forced restart at every corner. It is incredibly tedious. The first third is frustrating (even after you find how to make it work). The second third becomes pretty boring (it’s always the same thing). And the last, well… if you managed to pull through until then, it has to be because of spite.

Oh and if you’re trying to keep track of the different rooms? Yeah… don’t bother making a map. IT WILL NOT MAKE SENSE! The whole thing is procedurally generated (random room, random direction). Just the command and the name of the rooms is sufficient.

This is truly the quintessential mad scientist insane project. This game should probably be send to your enemies (or to troll your friends). Absolute torture.
But I feel proud for being the first person to beat it :P

BEER is a relatively short Twine piece where two teenagers are trying to (illegally) buy some beer, discussing their plan to hopefully acquire the loot. And it doesn’t really go as they expect it . There multiple “endings”, with some only accessible through hidden links. I say “endings” because, if you are patient enough, you will end up getting stuck inside a trippy loop.

It’s pretty silly, starting with one of those teen adventures that may or may not end well. I haven’t really seen those in real life (cause we always had that one friend or sibling who was old enough to get us beer), but I’m sure it’s definitely a thing!

But then… you get these weird errors (fake, because Harlowe errors don’t look like that - except one later in a path), mentioning old Gods and a nudge at Greek Mythology (the Odysseus variable), as if those teens, oblivious to everything around them, stumbled into something they shouldn’t have (you may or may not die in one ending). Which… why? What does beer have to do with Gods? (or more what doesn’t xD)

Like many annoying games, this one also includes some timed elements, though it is to hide the truly nonsensical trippy, eye-maddening path (awful colour contrast/animated elements). It is completely disjointed from the main story…

Has some good, even for a deliberately bad game.

You’re the Judge Now, Dog! is a Twine game(??), partly meta, partly a joke game (duh), partly… I don’t know how to characterise it? a rant? a weird praise? It’s a bit all over the place. There are 5 endings, some more gruelling to get than others.

The whole game moves along with the whims of an unlikeable narrator, who really wants to talk to you about Buford Rootberg, and how amazing of a guy he is (and how much of a looser you are), in between weird rants about –spin the wheel to pick a topic– and pokes at your disappointing… well, evertyhing. You go through an interview (a bit humiliating), shove your face with Hot Pockets (no vegetarian options?!), and bomb the ratings of all the games submitted to the jam (obviously they deserved it!).

I am not quite sure what exactly happens next, whether your life turns upside down and goes through some surreal experience where you are granted the honour of meeting (again) Buford Rootberg… or if it’s just some weird dream because of your definitely poor diet (so many Hot Pockets!!).

The absolute worst thing about this game, aside from the infuriating narrator and his questionable takes, was the timed text. Absolutely awful. Every single line is timed (around 2s each) and you have many many lines to read per passage.
Also pretty bad? The links. In three different spots, your page is covered with links (one is slightly worse than the other), all of which you have to click to go through. Infuriating. My hand would like a refund, please and thank you.

For some reason, the audio wasn’t working (I tried downloading the game, opening it on different browser, used the toggle…) and some images were broken too.

And for the low, very low price of $7,734.40, you too can own the source code (or skip the pay button). It actually does some interesting things with loops, especially with the randomised placement of links in loops.

So, yeah… it’s pretty bad. As you’d expect.

time for bed is a relatively short parser game with a simple objective: get ready for bed. To do that you need to get into your pyjamas, drink a warm cup of milk, and brush your teeth. The map is pretty small: bedroom, bathroom, living room, kitchen. There are multiple endings and achievements to find while playing the game. It also has a fairly limited vocabulary (no synonyms).

On top of this, it’s got some pretty fun humour, that got my chuckling quite a bit. Like starting with the tutorial but not the game, doing the suggested commands, searching through the rooms. Something you’d definitely expect of that kind of simple, slice of life, chill puzzle game. Also, it was nice to get an obvious visual for when to press to continue and input the next command.

Except… I am not sure the game can be actually finished. On multiple occasions, I would get a server timeout or my window would just close mid-way through giving me a response (like wear pyjamas was impossible!). There are also issues of unresponsive commands (can’t examine/interact described objects), and some friction with the commands (can only put something in the microwave with the open microwave command).

Shaaaame… :_:

'Steading of the Hill Giant Chief is a short fantasy parser game where you play as a wizard just back from a beating by a giant. Though your ego is a bit bruised (and maybe your body is too), nothing will stop you from defeating those perfidious creatures… you just need a new plan and get ready.

Using a (very) limited list and ample hints, the puzzles are fairly easy to complete. You just need a good weapon, a fitting costume, and maybe a potion for extra help. Some of the commands even do extra steps (like taking an ingredient will also put it in the cauldron). Always a bonus point for including a cat and letting us pet it.

On the other hand, some objects are not always quite obvious (like the exact ingredient listed somewhere else but that general descriptions) or not described (though, they don’t really matter, so that’d OK). But if you read the responses properly, it isn’t really difficult to go around it.

Finally, the writing. It’s fantastic. It hits just the right balance of hilarious, but in that kind of old TTRPG/Fantasy game style. I didn’t even finish the intro that I was already laughing so hard. It was so much fun, I was disappointed to see it end so quickly!

LIMBO is a short binksi piece, in which you incarnate a visa-applicant waiting to hear back from the government. In this setting, you are provided with housing (or more like, locked inside) until your case has been approved (or denied). Today marks a year since you’ve been stuck here. Will you get the email you’re hoping for?

It was really fun to explore the room, bump on the different furniture to get a glimpse into your psyche, hopes and wishes, or interact with the different objects. It feels really claustrophobic, with how cramped the room is (I don’t think I would have managed to stay the year), and dystopian (how can you be locked in the room for so long!!!). And the different endings freaked me out…

I liked it quite a bit!

Room 2039 is a horror short game where you are stuck inside a locked room, with only a monitor to interact with. With no other way out, you need to follow the screen’s instructions for a chance to escape. But if you fail, you will spend the eternity in the void. Essentially, you need to play a game of chance for your life.

The game itself is essentially one of chance, with die to roll. Winning rolls bring your closer to freedom, while losing ones to the void. There is a bit of strategy to it, as the game includes some limitations, but you still need to be lucky with your die.

Interjected are comments from the monitors depending on the rolls you get, coupled with some jump scares (even if you expect them to be there). It’s pretty sudden and quick.

Throne is a micro fantasy piece where you are an unnamed ruler of an unnamed kingdom, crushed through rebellion. Alone and deserted by who you trusted the most, you walk around your castle and interact with different items, reminiscing on how you got here.

With so few words, the prose does a great job comparing the then and now, and showing everything has gone haywire so quickly. And I liked the slightly open ending, where you sit on the throne, as if waiting for the rebellion to get to you, waiting to fight (and maybe succumb to) them.

PARANOIA is a short spot-the-difference parser, where you are tested on your attention and memory skills. Set in a testing chambers, you are tasked to spot differences between the first version of the room and any other potential changes between rounds. You will need 13 correct answers in a row to finish the game. But if you make a mistake, you’re right back at 0.

The game is pretty easy, with the differences quite obvious (or at least the one I got): something appears or disappears, something looks different, something sounds different. While you can use all your senses, I got by with only examining the room (and even, it didn’t feel necessary, I just went and double-checked just in case). If it hadn’t been made in just a week, I would have wished there were a bit more of the less-obvious differences.
EDIT: APPARENTLY I MIGHT BE INCREDIBLE LUCKY WITH ME RUN! THANK YOU RNG GOD!

BUT because of the error rule (sending you back to 0 if your make an error), the further you get into the test, the more anxious you become: you don’t want to make a mistake and have to start it all over again. It is a bit insidious how such a simple premise just creeps up on you and hold you by the throat like this. I felt so proud getting to the end in one go!

If the game is ever released as an extended version, I will play it as soon as it comes out.