Quest for the Teacup of Minor Sentimental Value

This game is just fun. A comedic parody of RPG games that didn't take itself seriously, with lines and events that made me laugh out loud so many times. I saw some reviews saying this sort of parody is overdone, but it's the first time I've encountered this type of game and I found it delightful.

Jasmine has lost her favourite teacup, and obviously there's nothing else to do than go on a quest to retrieve it. At multiple points you're given the choice to go home, or escalate this absurd quest even further, with with sensible choice always leading to a Bad End. Will you really go confront Actual Literal Satan over one teacup that doesn't even have a pattern on it anymore because it washed off? Yes, of course you will.

I laughed out loud so many times. (Spoiler - click to show) Choosing the path to “the swamp of an instant inevitable doom” means Jasmine will immediately walk into a poisoned swamp and die. If answer the genie's questions wrong, he will punt you out of the screen, into the swamp, and you die. Satan protesting his power is too mighty, how dare you accuse him of just walking into a house to steal one small teacup??? When that's exactly what he did.

I didn't mind the walking animations; I found it added character, and it was incorporated into the comedy really nicely. This shock of Jasmine just, walking straight into the death swamp. That long sequence of her climbing up the stairs!

And that last (Spoiler - click to show) battle with Satan. Love that your HP just — doesn't change, doesn't mean anything, all the numbers are lies, I one-shot killed him with an insult.

Adapted from an IFCOMP24 Review

RPG Maker is not my jam. Its throwback graphics are adorable for about the first two minutes, then the experience quickly becomes dominated by a maddeningly slow full traversal of every screen. Regardless of the inventiveness of the screens in question, they grow tiresome as I watch the protagonist… walk. When it doubles down on a Pokemon-ish combat of ‘select move, randomize damage, repeat’ I can hear my brain groaning.

Anime doesn’t have any particular hooks in me either - though I’m more agnostic to it. There are anime works I enjoy, almost always because of the storytelling, not the animation style or tropes per se. Certainly, I do not seek out works in that style UNLESS I am given to understand the story is something special.

All that said, I do love me a good puncturing of sacred cows, and who doesn’t? The title of this piece alone cues its subversive intent, and grabs my attention. Applying it to a platform and style that I am suspicious about… yeah, I’d check that out.

Thankfully, you the player do not need to manually navigate the world, the game does that for you. Combat is tedious but not cruel, and has a move that amusingly short-circuits things. The settings are pretty random and graphically interesting. Where the work comes alive is by making the most of its subversions, I think. Yes in gameplay, though that remains the most mixed of successes. Really, it’s the writing that brings the whole thing to life.

Our protagonist wants a cup of tea. In a very specific mug. The obstacles in her path are hilariously out of scope to her quest, of which I would INCLUDE RPG Maker gameplay. That juxtaposition alone is amusing but could not carry the weight of the work if not for the wonderfully wry humor that infuses every interaction. NPCs are laughably venal and unhelpful, but vividly so. You get to talk to neighbors (who are understandably concerned if you start rifling their house), wizards and genies and everyone’s favorite, (Spoiler - click to show)Actual, Literal Satan. As far as I can tell that is his full, given name. Just reading it still elicits snorts from me.

Our protagonist is indefatigable in her progress, taking one bananas development after another totally in stride. Her observations about the proceedings are subversive yet somehow optimistic and warm, even when fighting! The whole thing builds a fun vibe that mostly overcomes its gameplay challenges. Its brevity is a key element here. The game seems to have a supernatural sense of where the ‘wearing out its welcome’ line is, and pulls up short.

It never really breached into Engaging, I don’t think RPG Maker is engineered to provide that experience for me. For sure though, the thing Sparked every step of the way. Only two things kept it from being seamless: 1) it would not run on my linux box because of font dependencies. This was fine, online is a perfectly acceptable experience. 2) the ‘space bar select’ input was pretty hair trigger. It often interpreted a button press as multiple clicks, making selections I had no intent of making. Also not a HUGE deal, though I likely missed some great dialogue because of it. Well worth your time, ESPECIALLY if RPG Maker is not your thing.

Played: 10/9/24
Playtime: 20m, bailed, joined guard, in swamp, won
Artistic/Technical ratings: Sparks of Joy/Mostly Seamless
Would Play Again?: No, experience feels complete

Artistic scale: Bouncy, Mechanical, Sparks of Joy, Engaging, Transcendent
Technical scale: Unplayable, Intrusive, Notable (Bugginess), Mostly Seamless, Seamless

"If you are cold, tea will warm you; if you are too heated, it will cool you; if you are depressed, it will cheer you; if you are excited, it will calm you."
- British Prime Minister William E. Gladstone (allegedly)

Like the titular sentimental feeling the protagonist expresses towards the titular teacup, the words of praise in this review will be minor. However, Quest for the Teacup of Minor Sentimental Value did reveal to me a number of things that I had not been aware of (due to my long absence from the scene), including that you can run RPGMaker games in the browser now. Huh. I shall file that one away for later.

I did enjoy the work, and I thought a lot of the comedy was clever. Some slightly missed the mark, but overall the idea of (Spoiler - click to show)tracking down, confronting and eventually overcoming Actual, Literal Satan - to retrieve a teacup you don't even particularly care for that badly - is good, and worth the short playtime.

There are a handful of choices here and there and a few bad ends, with only a couple of them being particularly memorable, so it's not quite as interactive as I'd hoped for. There is combat, but as far as I can tell that's just for a bit of flavor in certain circumstances.

All in all, a moderately entertaining experience. Three Portals to Hell out of five.

Note: This review was written during IFComp 2024, and originally posted in the authors' section of the intfiction forum on 15 Sep 2024.

This is a graphical RPG, Japanese style, maybe made with RPG Maker? And you’re off on a quest to find your favourite teacup. All in a rather cosy fantasy setting.

On plus the characters that you meet are well defined, and interesting to encounter. The main decisions you have in the game seem to be how you negotiate with these other people.

However the story itself is very linear, more so I felt than the author’s previous JRPG Quest for the Sword of Justice. I felt as though I had more freedom to explore that world, and to decide what to do when. With this one it felt very much as though I was often just stepping through a series of events.

So that was disappointing for me. But I thought the NPCs were really well done. And I did laugh out loud at times. I just wanted more agency, and a better sense of control.

It may also be an issue that I’m a bit too old for the era where these sorts of games were very popular. So I don’t have that strong sense of nostalgia. And in interactive fiction, whether it be text based or graphical or a mix, I want agency.

But yes, the characters were well done and there were appropriate laughs as I played.

The parodic sendup of CRPG tropes is such a hoary old subgenre that I think I’ve already written two or three different intros discussing the microgenre in previous reviews just over the last couple years. Rather than attempting to rehash them – or, heavens forfend, actually tracking them down, reading what I’d previously written, and trying to synthesize them or even speak a new word – let’s just take as read that I find CRPGs lots of fun but yes, of course, they’re sufficiently ridiculous that without more satire can feel just like shooting fish in a barrel. Merely pointing out that RPG protagonists will go off to challenge immortal evil wizard-kings with only the flimsiest of provocations might provoke faint amusement, but not anything more than that sitting here 50 years on from the creation of DnD.

QftToMSV is certainly the kind of game that you think of when you think of this kind of game – the jumping off point is that you, the proprietor of a tea room, seem to have misplaced a teacup you had before you started your business and therefore feel a slight bit of attachment to, and as a result you’re willing to ransack your neighbors’ houses, stare down an incarnation of supernatural evil, and scale a mysterious, forbidding tower as you try to reclaim it – but happily the level of execution is high. For one thing, it’s quite streamlined so that you don’t need to put in a lot of busywork to get to the next joke; it’s implemented in RPG Maker, but navigation is taken care of for you, and combat is generally a quickly-finished indication that something’s gone wrong, so it winds up running almost as quick as a pure choice-based game. It also doesn’t play coy about how to reach the “best” ending; at almost every decision node, you’re offered a choice of doing things the easy, common-sense way, or escalating them absurdly, and off course taking the off-ramps leads to a “bad end” while steering into the skid keeps the shaggy dog story going (the author also helpfully autosaves the game quite frequently, so there’s little risk to exploring losing paths).

But this sort of thing lives or dies by the quality of its gags, and happily they’re quite good. “Ha ha, look a the CRPG protagonist rummaging around their neighbors’ possessions” is a dull commonplace, but following it up by having the rummagee respond to your assertion that it’s totally OK to steal everything that isn’t nailed down with "I was a juror in a court case a few years back, and that was very much not the view the judge took” was unexpected enough to provoke a laugh. Similarly, “the evil overlord calls you mean for assuming he’s bad just because he looks and acts just like an evil overlord” is a one-note joke, but the game hits it hard and repeatedly, so it reaches Sideshow-Bob-stepping-on-a-rake-fifteen-times levels of funniness. And the sly use of endings encourages messing around; the first BAD END is self-evidently a totally fine outcome, and what’s even funnier, (Spoiler - click to show) I’m pretty sure it’s only like 5% different from the hard-won GOOD END.

Is all this enough to make QftToMSV anything other than an ephemeral amusement? I don’t think so; it’s a well-executed example of its genre, but it never manages to transcend said genre’s limitations (not that I get the sense it was trying to). It’s worth a play to enjoy the well-paced jokes, but I guarantee you absolutely will look at CRPG sidequests in exactly the same way ever again.

In this game, the protagonist finds her favorite teacup missing, and embarks upon a quest to retrieve it—a quest that will take her into a spooky forest, a poison swamp, a wizard’s tower, and maybe even the depths of hell. The game was created in RPGMaker to achieve the correct aesthetic (which it does in charming and attractive fashion), but functions as a gauntlet in which one choice will progress the main plot and the other(s) will lead to a bad end.

This is all in service of a parody of RPG tropes, which is not exactly untrodden ground. Observations about RPG characters breaking into people’s houses and taking their stuff have been made before. Commentary on the lengths to which a PC will go, risking life and limb, for relatively inconsequential sidequests is not new either (and in fact this isn’t a million miles away from the same author’s Elftor and the Quest of the Screaming King, although the main focus there was more on the also-much-mocked convention of messing around with sidequests while the fate of the kingdom hangs in the balance and you’re supposed to be saving it).

The wizard tower was my favorite bit: (Spoiler - click to show)he has a fake teleport pad at the base of his tower that actually vaporizes intruders hoping for an easy way up, and when you prove your worth by taking the stairs, he offers you a perfect magical teacup that will never chip or allow its contents to go cold. (You can accept, but this is a Bad End because you didn’t get your teacup.) This is still in the territory of “RPG protagonists are thieving murderhobos and also have bizarre priorities,” but the wizard’s involvement (less as a straight-man comedic partner than a different kind of weirdo) adds an entertaining extra layer. The two of them are both baffled to minorly horrified at aspects of each other’s behavior, and they simultaneously are correct and really don’t have room to criticize.

I’m also a sucker for a “we’re going to make you deal with this legendarily annoying game mechanic—haha just kidding” gag, so I enjoyed the poison swamp ((Spoiler - click to show)it just insta-kills you, and the PC has an “I don’t know what I expected” moment).

If RPG parodies are the kind of thing you can’t get enough of, Quest for the Teacup is a well-executed entry in the genre and you’ll probably have a great time. In its best moments, it entertained me too—and it’s a half-hour game with a concentration of good moments that’s fairly high, so I would say I enjoyed it more than I didn’t. But I did always have that nagging sense of deja vu.

This is a game made using, I think, RPG maker, not the first IFComp game with that engine (the same author made Quest for the Sword of Justice).

The idea is that your teacup has been stolen and you want to retrieve it. You can opt not too, getting a bad ending. In fact, there are a lot of bad endings!

Most text games don't have the features found in this game, so when I rate it in ifcomp and on ifdb I'll focus on the features it has in common with text games, which I'll describe next. Then I'll describe the features not common to text games.

The writing is witty, some of the funniest to me in the whole competition. The lampshading of the silliness of the quest, the banter, is just great to me. The characters and settings constantly escalate (I like the 'Swamp of Instant Death' or whatever it's name was). There are enough options to feel like I had at least some freedom, some opportunity to express my personality.

For the non-IF parts:

The ultra-HD tileset used looked weird to me. It was kind of in the uncanny valley.

Having to wait for the character to move between each interaction drove me nuts. I blanked out and five minutes later I had been scrolling through Twitter, and tried to remember what I was doing, and realized I had clicked out of this game a while ago to wait for the animation to finish, and came back to it. I steeled myself to continue, but after accidentally picking the wrong option in Satan's house due to relentlessly hitting the 'skip' button (which for some reason is the same as the 'choose option' button), and running into two long combats in the forest in a row, I quit, since I had already seen 2 or 3 endings. I am completely uninterested in games incorporating long animations between text like this. I don't think that would make the author feel bad, as Damon Wakes is brilliant and has done a lot of different media, often to provoke specific responses from readers or judges, so I think getting a strong reaction to the game's techniques would be a positive thing.

Very funny text though. I would definitely read the rest of the game if I didn't have to watch any more animations.