Space Aliens Laughed at my Cardigan

Baf's Guide

This game seems like something a bored twelve-year-old wrote in the span of an hour without going back to change anything he had written. It exudes a consistent awfulness that earns it the lowest degree of honor available in this guide. It violates every known principle of game design, with arbitrary deaths and arbitrary puzzles, but that's not all: this game was apparently never debugged. Half the commands simply do not work. The faulty mechanics are complemented by hideous spelling (it took me hours to realize what a "sionide pill" is) and a sense of humor about as sharp as a bale of cotton. The plot: The aliens didn't just laugh at your cardigan, they destroyed it. You have to get a replacement before Mom finds out. I really suggest that you try this game, if only to see how vile a game can be.

-- Carl Muckenhoupt

SPAG
The puzzles themselves are nonsensical; sometimes typing HELP will get you a hint, other times not. The atmosphere of the game is badly fragmented; items and locations are thrown together without the slightest rhyme or reason. The parser is unresponsive at best and damnably frustrating most other times. There are a few funny bits of text -- the chess grandmaster in particular is rather humorous -- but most of the attempts fall on their face. (Molley the Mage)

This game is not just bad, but unspeakably so, and it's uniformly bad; the writing, the puzzles, the atmosphere, the plot, the NPCs, the room descriptions, the attempts at humour are all miserable. If there was an award for the world's worst adventure game, this game would be an obvious candidate. In addition, this game must be the most bug-infested piece of software it's ever been my misfortune to try; it actually seems as if the author hasn't even tried playing his own game once, or he would have found the bugs immediately. (Magnus Olsson)
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SynTax
I then found that I could open almost anything. I opened a policeman, a pigeon, a dog, my gran and even objects that I did not even have in my possession. The game was now becoming a pain but the final crunch came when I began to examine my leather jacket. It was a smart jacket with a small pocket that you could open and close. As I could not find any use for the jacket I dropped it in my granny's house. Later in the game I used 'INVENTORY' and lo and behold, I found that I still had the pocket. [...] The next command I entered was 'QUIT'.
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