A Paradox Between Worlds

by Autumn Chen profile

Slice of life
2021

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Number of Reviews: 7
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
A nostalgic and critical snapshot of (Tumblr) fandom, May 29, 2023
by manonamora
Related reviews: ifcomp

To this day, I am still baffled about how this game was able to recreate the vibes of Tumblr fandom from the 2010s (I shouldn't be surprised considering Autumn's references). From the old Tumblr Blue to the very virulent fandom conflicts, or the fan-organised conversions, or the always-left-behind character (sorry, Tycho), APBW perfectly encapsulate a prolific time of fandom culture.
It was kind of nostalgic to me, having lived through quite a bit of the Supernatular/Doctor Who/Sherlock shenanigans... Though I was not really into the fanfic side of it all.

But APBW is more than a snapshot of the very fascinating ecosystem of Tumblr fandom. It is also a commentary* on how the relationship between a piece of work and its fans change overtime, especially when a ripple in the fanbase, like a mundane headcanon post, creates a storm as the author of the work gets involved (and not for the better). Raising questions (but not answering) about what fans would do in this situation: do they keep on enjoying the work that is so deeply personal to them (maybe even have helped explore their identify) or do they disavow it completely; do they band together in support of the victim/targeted group or do they have a blasé attitude about the issue; do they try to keep the fandom community alive and stand as one or do they become fragmented**;...
*might not have been the author's intent, but this was my perception.
**the death of fandoms are... something. It was very bittersweet to kind of relieve it.

It gets even more shocking/impactful when the OP of the post identifies as trans and the author goes on a (inter-?)national broadcast spewing transphobic rhetoric, leading to the teenager being harassed and abused. The fandom (and online communities at large)'s reaction is very troubling, but neither new not surprising. From the hard-core fans who will support the author no matter what, the ones who will question any actions trying to show support for the targeted group (like a boycott), the ones who will not engage with the drama, or the ones who roll their eyes at it because they were calling out the author all along... this is a real thing that happens. And is portrayed in this game with all the visceral intensity you'd find on Tumblr/Twitter/other social media.

Even without the author (GTM) adding onto the fire (which was already sparking before their disgusting action), the games portrayed the parasocial relationships between the fandom users, how even adults can get caught up in what people would think as petty teenage drama, or how being online is not just an escape from IRL problems, feels very real. I have personally seen those call-out posts between fanfic authors about plagiarism, those fake-pologies to calm down the fandom in hopes everyone forgets, the "kid-friendly" spaces still filled with inappropriate/problematic contents, the Discourse, the fights between people not following the conventions of interaction...

Even if the online characters are based on tropes, they all have their stories to piece together: the self-proclaimed fandom mom, whose chronically online presence hides her avoidance to live her life truthfully*, the supportive adult who plays a double-role to take down bigger name accounts, the always critical-puts herself in the discourse-calls out the shitty stuff-overall is kind of a bummer (but a correct bummer), and the kids who just want some space for themselves. I have followed this people before (have I been those too?), I have had those weird-ass URL, I have been in those fandom fights... It was not just real, it felt being right back in those communities.
*I really didn't like Claire, but the more I've been thinking about their arc, the more I find her arc compelling. Her shitty actions still isn't fully balanced by the end, but there is some steps taken in the right direction.

And then there is you, the player, trying to navigate the dumpster fire that is the Nebula fandom as you want to reach your goal of writing a fanfiction* and gain a bit of notoriety (I did manage to double my followers count in this playthrough :P), balancing your relationship between the different users you follow, and your relationship with the Nebula universe. You can choose you name, your pronouns, your URL, your favourite character, your ship, the reason why you are creating fanfic, and what kind of post your blog is filled with. But your character is not the focus of this game (the above paragraphs are).
*I, of course, titled mine A Paradox Between Worlds.

This PC-is-not-the-MC is reflected in the fanfiction you are "writing", as each part reminds you/Gali this is not your story. Gali moves on from one universe to the other*, finding different versions of [their] friends entangled in trope-y AU (Alternate Universe) and feeling out of place/alone/like an outsider every single time (like You the player might feel this way in the Nebula community). Your actions defines the ship you have in your writing, as well as the quality of the writing. The focus on senses at the start of each new scene made me giggle a bit, from a parser "player" perspective.
*the multi-verse take was so meta, with APBW having the Canon/Fanfiction/Online universes in play. Autumn, your mind!!!

As the drama of the Nebula community unfolds, you find yourself struggling with writing/finishing the fan-fiction, reflecting on the feelings you have about the series itself considering the author's comments. In my playthrough, I pushed through, and found... myself, as the Destroyer (the Nebula baddie), meeting Gali, reminding [them] it is not [their] story, telling [them] the story is about to end, that maybe it should never have existed in the fist place... and that maybe you learned some lessons along the way... Writing the last part of the fanfiction hit me like a ton a brick, and made me question how I have consumed and created content in the past.

Finally*, there is the Canon. Each movement/chapter starts with a snippet of The Chronicles of the Shadow Nebula to contextualise the fandom, but also give some sort of preview of what is to come in the Online universe (very much a Cassandra vibe to them...). Though the author has mentioned the influence coming mainly from Homestuck**, I found more similarities with other YA universes (HP***, Divergent, or any YA-series-with-a-house/class-system-having-to-fight-a-big-baddie, and even a bit of the Hunger Games...). I dove into the codex in the stats page and devoured it, finding nuggets of gold and trying to link it to works I knew. One of my favourite bit: the Selene Dione character who is a Hannah Montana parody.
*lol, i've organised this in the reverse of how you experience each part in game...
**that's mainly because I never got into Homestuck that I didn't pick up on those references
***especially the main gang...

I don't know how to conclude this review. So I will leave with the final chat you can have with the gang: no one goes through character arcs like the books, IRL is messy and not everyone wants to share this part of themselves online, growing up is hard but so is growing apart from something that was important for you, moving on is also part of life...

So yea...

Go play this game.

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