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Review
Adapted from a Review-A-Thon 26 Review
Style: Parser
Played: 7/21/26
Playtime: 1hr, 23/23, unclear bonus?
Andrew Schultz has long been the Stephen King of interactive word games. Not the cocaine part, the insanely prolific body of work that sometimes references itself but mostly inhabits a narrow band between “pretty darn entertaining” to “what an accomplishment.” (I am ignoring Under the Dome for rhetorical purposes.) This work sits squarely in his playful ouvre’. Piloting the protag, you must treasure hunt through a wordplay world with Spoonerism sorcery. (Too bad it wasn’t alliteration!) You can accumulate objects, many of which also spooner to make progress, ultimately securing the McGuffin to win. On the way, you are treated to an explication of Graham Nelson’s Player Bill of Rights? And also some pretty extensive handholding?
These last two kind of show the work’s origins: an introductory text using wordplay and narrator asides to walk a new player through the conventions of parser IF. I could choose to write about how the ADVENTURON paradigm supports this education, carrying the esthetics of a grade school primer that kind of sings off its gameplay. And extends to the generous, primitive map and playfully amateurish illustrations. And to the use of color to emphasize text to cue different gameplay utility. Arguably, discussing the work without all that is to miss the point of the work entirely, nevermind churlishly ignoring the thoughtful, effective, and time intensive approach to indoctrinating the theoretical newbie audience. Except, some of my documented performance notwithstanding, I am NOT a novice player. All that stuff is a drag on MY experience. No, I am here for the wordgames, and I expect to have MY PANTS JUST CHARMED RIGHT OFF WHILE COMPLETING THEM.
Spoonerisms are kind of the Dad Jokes of wordplay. A little bit corny, more clever than we give them credit for, and delighting in their own obtuseness. They feel charming by how belligerently UNHIP they are. Isn’t Adventuron’s dawn-of-computer-graphics sensibility just a little bit like that too? And did the mad genius who thought to pair them have any idea they would work together SO WELL? Yeah, it’s some primitive, out-of-date sensibilities, wrapped around some not-all-that-difficult puzzle construction. But its just so FUN. The presentation has so much personality it is easy to take the educational intentionality for granted, and isn’t that really the best way to learn anyway? In my play-all-the-games haste, I zoomed through the gameplay, gamely consumed the required reading, and STILL managed to solve a few extra points by game’s end. I would tell you how many, but there seemed to be a glitch in the score code. For a while it was showing BASESCORE + BONUS/23 but somewhere before games’ end the BONUS dropped? I’m not sure how many I had, but less than 17 (as informed by the post-game achievements).
Two more “bugs” to report. Pacing Rations does not resolve to Racing Patience. And Quirky Test requires NO TWERKING WHATSOEVER. I am very sure I did not get all 17 bonus points. I am JUST as sure I will not rest until I do. Yes, once I complete the field in R-A-T, I am going back. Once again, Andrew Schultz has deployed his clever BROWSER TRICKS to defeat my belt with TROUSER BRICKS.
Consider the falling-slacks-based charm success metric MET.
