Birthday Simulator

Very Real Comments I've Gotten from People:

Let-off-studios (Glorious Trainwrecks):
"She wore MY signature outfit on MY birthday. The gall of that woman...

Funny stuff here. Well done! It's a shame about Roundhouse Rita, though.

EDIT: OH and I totally peed my pants with Carly the other day. High school sucked."

Capt_Hastings (Glorious Trainwrecks):
"This was the funniest thing I have read in a long time. The writing was great. So many good details. I can't believe I didn't check the centrifuge before I put something in there though. WTF I deserve what i got."

quasiotter (Glorious Trainwrecks):
"the fact that you had mary-s really spoke directly to my heart. i'm not kidding"

@queen_arthur (Twitter):
"I want you to understand my full meaning when I tell you that this is the funniest game I've ever played in my entire life
The first time I played it I cried.
It's short and free. Play it."

@desvlas (Twitter):
"jon you are a gift to this world"

My friend Kyle on Facebook:
"this is the kind of content I'm looking for"

A classically-designed twine meant for multiple short playthroughs to get a dazzling variety of endings, ranging from 'being on time' to 'political participation' to 'naked death.'

Amazing pacing and absurd humor. Laughed aloud through almost every storyline!