Staying Put

by verityvirtue profile

Slice of life
2016

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Number of Reviews: 1
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
Interesting premise diminished by awkward prose and errors, January 17, 2017
by streever (America)

This puzzle-free work has an interesting premise but seems to be broken with unimplemented and under-implemented actions. Most of the game consists of examining memories in your inventory: you have a phone which I couldn't seem to use, and memories (including one of a Peter) that I was unable to interact with.

I'm not sure if I missed my window: I didn't examine the Peter memory as soon as it appeared (announced with bold text in another memory), and that may explain why I couldn't access it later, but this seems like a bad design choice or a bug, as the piece even asserts that there are no puzzles or timed activities.

This piece takes place in a closed-off attic, where you hide from the public and reprisals by your former employer, the owner of a firm that seems to have been doing something questionably legal with medication. You stay put in your room, but can access a hallway and washroom, and work through linked memories. Eventually the piece ends, but I'm not sure why or what triggers the ending.

The prose can be clunky at times, and also features errors: one paragraph ends with a comma, and I am not sure if it's just a typo for a period, or if there should be more text that got cut off, but the awkwardness of the paragraph makes me think it's the latter.

I think this could become a strong piece with some editing and revising, but do not recommend it until then.