Bacon Wars

This story was apparently written in a very short period of time, but I’m not impressed with the uses of the English language on the first page with all the swears. Sure, I guess that’s the way someone might talk and all, but usually that’s just not needed in the written word.

Beyond that, well, at least there are choices in this story. There are indeed options that lead the reader off in different directions and the choices do appear to have a clear effect on the story. Beyond that, well, there’s just not all that much to this story. Most of the story seems to be focused on trying to kill police rather than actually trying to get some bacon (though perhaps that was the point of the story). So sure, this was written in 76 minutes, but perhaps it would have been quite a bit better if some more time was spent on it.