Top Villain: Total Domination

Today, smash your heroic nemesis! Tomorrow, build a doomsday device to take over the world!

Top Villain: Total Domination is a 228,000-word interactive comedy supervillain novel by Brandon Greer. It's entirely text-based, without graphics or sound effects, and fueled by the vast, unstoppable power of your imagination.

You are the world's most villainous supervillain, heck-bent on conquering the world. Carrying on your parents' villainous legacy, you have built your ideal secret lair and filled it with loyal and (mostly) competent henchpeople. You have honed all kinds of villainous skills, and thanks to your musical-theater training, you know how to make a dramatic entrance and construct the perfect evil monologue. You regularly rob banks and travel by jet pack—when you're not teleporting, that is—and you are hatching the absolute perfect plan to take over the world. Life is good. (Or evil. Which is good.) With your powers, smarts, and good looks, what can possibly stand in your way?

But there is a thorn in your side. A valiant yellow-clad thorn, with rippling muscles and chiseled jaw: the interplanetary hero Matchless Man. You may have defeated him in the past, but you know that heroes never give up. How will you bring this horrible hero down: will you turn him into a villain like you, negate his powers, or just fight him? And what will you do about his equally horrible and equally heroic friends? (Ugh! Why do heroes always have friends?) Then there’s the intrepid reporter that your henchpeople caught snooping on your secret lair: will you suborn them with your seductive wiles, or will you become the scoop of a lifetime? On top of that, the supervillain organization Multitude of Murderous Malcontents seems to have all of these silly rules about world domination, and they're conducting a surprise inspection! And, wait, are your henchpeople going on strike?

Oh, also, your mom keeps calling.

Can't a villain just build a giant world-destroying doomsday weapon in peace?